CAUTION : Read at your own risk, life altering ideas could arise.
The title of this book got me to buy it. Honestly, I did not even look up what the premise of the book was. I just got it.
Think of it as a blind date. And it was incredible.
Let me tell you that you have to be of a certain mental state for this book to “land with you”. Fortunately I was.
I have dropped quite a few books – simply because they did not resonate with me in the first few pages. This is definitely not the way I approach my relationships by the way. But books, yes I can be quite harsh with.
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The Second Mountain – The Quest for a Moral Life
– David Brooks
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The book is beautifully organized. I’m just a lazy reader, so this is a big plus for me.
Another big advantage is that Brooks (I hope he doesn’t mind being referred to as such, not that he’s going to read this blog but still!) very liberally uses many other gems from other great books and authors. In fact he himself states – “Its occurred to me many times over the course of of writing this book that maybe I’m not really a writer. I’m a teacher or middle-man. I take the curriculum of other peoples knowledge and I pass it along.”
But writer he is. This is a No.1 Best seller.
I remember telling the husband that this book should probably be included in the curriculum of high school education. Or maybe a little bit later than that. It explores some of the most deep and fundamental aspects of being human and what evolution could look like. It is not pretentious or preachy. It just shares this understanding that has been achieved thanks to many lives lived through crises and triumphs. Lives that were dedicated to a larger purpose. “A journey downward within and then outward towards humanity”.
THE FIRST MOUNTAIN
“On the first mountain, we all have to perform certain life tasks: establish an identity, separate from our parents, cultivate our talents, build a secure ego, and try to make a mark in the world. People climbing that first mountain spend a lot of time thinking about reputation management. As the psychologist James Hollis puts it, at that stage we have a tendency to think , I am what the world says I am. Its all the normal stuff: nice home, nice family, nice vacations, good food, good friends and so on. ..Some people get to the top of that first mountain, taste success, and find it…unsatisfying. Is this all there is?, they wonder.”
Relatable ?
Brooks explores the possibilities that follow – some significant tragic events, or just a gradual loss of appeal – which lands people into a “valley”. A place where they start to rethink all about themselves. “Most of us get better at living” he says.
And eventually, “They realize, as Henri Nouwen put it, that they are much better than their ego ideal.”
THE SECOND MOUNTAIN
“You don’t climb the second mountain the way you climb the first mountain. You conquer your first mountain. You identify the summit, and you claw your way toward it. You are conquered by your second mountain..“
“On the first mountain you tend to be ambitious, strategic and independent. On the second mountain you tend to be relational, intimate and relentless.” Something else drives you. Something much bigger than your known self.
But these are tricky waters. Because we live in a culture of ‘hyper-individualism’. How to think of yourself as inter-dependent and take comfort in it ? Take pride in it? That you are not ‘the driver’ and its a collective effort?
“Our current society has become a conspiracy against joy. It has put too much emphasis on the individuating part of our consciousness… Joy often involves self forgetting”.
Think of the last time you were delirious with joy. Maybe playing hide and seek with your kids? Maybe dancing with a group of friends ? Maybe cheering with a big stadium at a match ? That feeling is different isn’t it ? You aren’t conscious of yourself. In fact quite the opposite, you have completely forgotten about yourself.
THE ACEDIA PANDEMIC & THE INSTAGRAM LIFE
“Living life online often means living in a state of diversion. When you’re living in diversion you’re not actually deeply interested in things; you’re just bored at a more frenetic pace.” Simply love how Brooks states that. He calls some of our devices “de-commitment devices”.
But this is the unfortunate stage we find ourselves in as a society. How do we manage to change how we think with this constant intrusion of this and that ?
It is crucial we do. Crucial.
“Those who shape the manners and mores are the true legislators of mankind…they wield the greatest power and ‘influence’. It usually starts with a subculture.”
A step forward is learning how to think in spite of this ‘Instagram culture’.
“Learning how to think really means learning how to exercise some control over how and what you think.”
Easier said than done. We want to compete and climb and be better than and so on. It never ends.
“The meritocracy’s soul-flattening
And so have insecure overachievers. Like me. We put our passions on the back burner because what if they don’t really gel with the other side of our professional personality ?? God forbid!
Well, I learnt there is a term for that. Acedia. We have an Acedia pandemic.
“Acedia is the term. It is the quieting of passion. It is a lack of care. It is living a life that doesn’t arouse your strong passions and therefore instills a sluggishness of the soul..The person living in acedia may have a job and a family , but he is not entirely grabbed by his own life. His heart is over there, but his life is over here.”
And as Brooks mentions “Suffering that is not transformed is transmitted.”
I very much intend to transform. And re-ignite my passions.
“The passions are not the opposite of reason; they are the foundation of reason and often contain a wisdom the analytic brain cant reach.”
YOUR SOUL (If you just skim through this blog, please do read this)
“Its amazing how untroubled you can be, year after year, while your soul is out there somewhere far away. But eventually it hunts you down. In this way the soul is like a reclusive leopard living high up in the mountain forest somewhere. You may forget about him for long stretches. You are busy with the normal mundane activities of life, and the leopard is up in the mountains. But from time to time out of the corner of your eye, you glimpse the leopard, just off in the distance, trailing you through the tree trunks. There are spare moments when you vaguely or even urgently feel his presence. This can happen agonizingly, in the middle of one of those sleepless nights, when your thoughts come, as one poet puts it, like a drawer full of knives. There’s trouble in your soul, and it keeps you awake. The leopard can visit during one of those fantastic moments with friends or family…and you are overwhelmed with gratitude.
And then there are moments, maybe more toward middle or old age, when the leopard comes down out of the hills and just sits there in the middle of your doorframe. He stares at you inescapabaly. He demands your justification. What good have your served? For what did you come? What sort of person have you become? There are no excuses at that moment. Everybody has to throw off the mask.”
A COMMITTED LIFE
Brooks dives into what a purposeful life can look like. How to think about it ? What should be the tenets of such a life? A commitment to a vocation, a spouse /family, a philosophy/faith and to a community. Brooks explores them all. He argues that it is these commitments that give us a sense of identity, a sense of purpose, a higher level of freedom and they help build our character.
The first Commitment : VOCATION
A very interesting section. Brooks talks about the role mentors play – and none of it is the traditional ‘gyaan’ you would have read so far. Your outlook on mentoring could change, as mine did.
He then talks about “a daemon”. The Greeks had this concept – “A daemon is a calling, an obsession…clusters of energy…that were charged by some mysterious event in childhood that we imperfectly comprehended.” I wouldn’t recommend being too analytical about it. It’s probably best to think about your ‘daemon’ while you do the usual 9-9..it’s where some answers lie waiting. And they cannot be forced.
..and once you find it DIG THE DAMN DITCH !
Once you discover your daemon – practice it, intentionally. “Deliberate practice slows the automatizing process. As we learn a skill, the brain stores the new knowledge in the unconscious layers (think of learning to ride a bike). But the brain is satisfied with good enough. If you want to achieve the level of mastery, you have to learn the skill so deliberately that when the knowledge is stored down below, it is perfect.”
“One of the best pieces of advice for young people is, Get to yourself quickly.”
Simple statement and yet better than any advice I have ever heard from anyone of any importance from any walk of life! Think about who you are and how you think – a bit deeply. The younger you are when you do it, the better outcomes you will have.
The second Commitment : MARRIAGE
No real comments here, Brooks describes the levels of intimacy between two people. I found this section to be a bit boring.
The third Commitment : PHILOSOPHY & FAITH
This is an intellectual commitment. “One is apt to think of moral failure as due to a weakness of character,” the British educator Sir Richard Livingstone wrote. “More often it is due to an inadequate ideal.” Family values matter in shaping the course of this journey. Small rituals make big impacts later in life. I began to revisit some of my childhood experiences – seemingly unimportant – but how much they shaped my world view. As they say, hindsight is a wonderful thing.
Declutter your desires and place upon the table only the ones which are truly worth having. That’s what my family values seem to be.
The fourth Commitment : COMMUNITY
This section is where some life altering things happened in my head. If our fundamental nature is to love each other – we have systematically assaulted that every single day. With the high rises and apartment culture proliferating, we barely speak to our neighbor. It just feels unnecessary and awkward. How did that happen ? And what about the thousands of people on the streets just a few kilometers away from where we live ? A hot meal can change their faith in God and humanity. A hot meal that we can so very easily provide. But we don’t think of these things. There is no time.
“Community is also under assault because we’ve outsourced care…Mental well-being is now the job of the therapist. Physical health is now the job of the hospital or the government. Education is the job of the school system.” After all, I pay taxes. Hyper-individualism.
It’s time to change ? Yes it is time.
I cannot say I ‘enjoyed’ this book. It would not quite do justice to the feelings the book stirred.
I think I will re-read this – again and again.
Big hug x
Long review of the 2nd mountain.. beautifully summarised. Acedia..I am curious of this new term.